Beberapa bulan terakhir ini, biasanya dalam setahun ada dua periode “sibuk sidang” yaitu Mei-Juni dan Desember-Januari, ada satu kegiatan yang rutin saya lakukan dalam rangka self-enhancement sekaligus becoming morally supportive for fellow Doctoral students in Communication science, yaitu menghadiri sidang hasil penelitian (biasa disebut SHP) dan sidang promosi dari kakak tingkat (Angkatan 2016-2018), juga rekan seangkatan, Mbak RDP pada Mei 2022 lalu.
Mindfully aware of the consequences of attending the activities, both their upsides, and downsides, I come to observe some interesting phenomena and for these, I take some notes. Hopefully, these notes will be of interest to you who are currently enrolled as Doctoral students in Comm science or social science in general, or those who would be applying to attend one any time soon.
The upsides are listed below:
1) self-enhancement in terms of preparing myself to be examined as such in the near future, knowing in depth and in detail about some characteristics of the questions typically addressed to Promovendus, some pitfalls usually be given a warning (such as the incoherence of paragraphs and ideas; some pabalieut or messiness of arguments’ construction; lack of convincing data and data-types; etc.), and, luckily, some insights coming from the so-called examiners-as-experts.
2) becoming morally supportive of my fellow doctoral students to the point of they feel not left behind unnoticed, or, in a more positive tone, being appreciated for the hard work they have given in composing the dissertation reports and the possible novelty they offer to the body of knowledge proper.
3) in a rare moment of eureka, the philosophical wonder of wisdom, the thaumazein, erupts to the surface of my consciousness and takes hold of bridging the hitherto impossible thinking beyond imagination to the realm of measured ideas and tentative concepts. The differences in topics and methods do not obstruct the way the passionate pursuit of knowledge shown by my fellow colleagues (“the act of performativity”) reverberates and unlocks some confusion previously entrenched in my own locker of mind. Thinking in a similar “fate” and situation means venturing beyond the impassable to the familiar terrain to walk.
4) do ut des: when I give you mine, I hope in the near future you will give me yours (attention, help, etc.) Of course, the disappointment is there lurking in the shadow of “being forgotten” but at least the law of attraction still works for some.
The Downsides are not many but there are some, indeed:
1) the unbearable feeling of being tortured with scathing reviews and childlike treatment addressed to the promovendus sometimes seeps into the innermost feeling (the unconscious one, eh?) of myself as a spectator, fostering a suppressed feeling of built-up insecurity. This feeling would sway the solid foundation of having knowledge of the subject matter being researched and, to some extent, would corrode mental health and well-being.
2) lacking self-confidence would be contagious if no proper shield is prepared in advance.
Hopefully, these reflections would be beneficial for deepening your (our) understanding of the crux of the matter 😀